Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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