I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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