I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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