Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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