i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
