She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize