from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
