Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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