The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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