I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize