He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
