she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
