Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
