fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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