Don't you send me to vm
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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