i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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