Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Randomize