Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
