God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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