Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
