i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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