I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
We got so high we made milksteak
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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