Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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