Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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