Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
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