wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
