Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Randomize
