How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Two words: blizzard sex
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
