My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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