I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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