You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
