So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
