these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
