love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
