I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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