Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE

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(307): View more from Wyoming

We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.

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(303): View more from Colorado

"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"

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(913): View more from Kansas

I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?

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(860): View more from Connecticut

Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.

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(318): View more from Louisiana

Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?

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(714): View more from California

I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.

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(602): View more from Arizona

I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.

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(714): View more from California

My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.

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