i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
My bed smells like the plague
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
