...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
