I will die if light touches me.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
you made out with another girl for some wings
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
