Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
