Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
