Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Randomize
