Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
