i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
