dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
