alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
