Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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