do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
i am craving dick and cupcakes
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
