No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
