put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize