come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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