Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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