there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
i now understand why vodka
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
